After two months of waiting/suffering, I finally got in to see the neurosurgeon to go over my MRI results. Why did it take two months, you ask? Welcome to the magical land of Kaiser Health Insurance. I was lucky that the technicians did not start throwing silverware and change near the magnetic field to see if something would stick during the scan. While the three weeks after my MRI in early December were brutal (my pain was easily a 9 out of 10), the beginning of January saw my body healing itself naturally. I was no longer popping anti-inflammatories like candy and I could actually get off the couch to participate in physical activities without being leveled for days afterwards. The neurosurgeon was a genial older woman with years of experience dealing with crippling injuries and miserable people. When going over my results, she said, "Wow. You do not do anything half way, do you?" She then called in another neurosurgeon to concur that my irritable L5 was one of the worst bulged discs she had ever seen. Luckily my back will require no surgery or painkillers going forward as my body has the super healing capabilities of Wolverine.

Labels: health, injury

Now that the bulged disc is mostly healed, the sciatic nerve is growing less annoying by the day and my stupid injury is tolerating two league nights of ice hockey again, the wife and I decided to get back on the fitness train. For Xmas we bought ourselves a treadmill and are looking into a bench and dumbbell set (I am hoping some recently divorced father of three will be unloading a joint cheap on Craigslist because he is moving into a crappy one bedroom apartment due to crushing monthly alimony and child support payments). These fitness items all fit nicely into our unfinished basement. My goal is to be back in pristine condition for the 2008 Runnin' Of The Green in the middle of March (Runnin' Of The Green is a 7K road race through downtown Denver which features free beer and corned beef upon crossing the finish line. The Irish finally got something right).

On Monday we started a high-fiber, high-vitamin cleansing that has shaved four pounds off my middle and has seen feces flying from my ass faster than a midget being fired from a cannon (I tallied a lifetime record ten bowel movements today that were both refreshing and enjoyable). We finish said cleansing this Saturday when I will start eating solid food again in lieu of fitness shakes and health bars.

Labels: health, injury, l-i-v-i-n, wife

I recently learned that I have a herniated disc. I tweaked my back after a hockey game last November and have spent the last year in varying degrees of agony. Bouncing around jobs and health providers this past year has not helped the recovery process. Nor has sitting in front of the computer nine to ten hours a day designing websites. Nor has playing in three softball leagues, two hockey leagues, one kickball league and running in six road races. These past few days I have been laid up on the couch and experiencing excruciating pain when attempting to put socks on. I started physical therapy on Tuesday and have an appointment with a reputable chiropractor tomorrow afternoon. I will be taking it easy for the next few weeks whacked out of my skull on horse-grade anti-inflammatories and tall glasses of bourbon.

Labels: injury, l-i-v-i-n

A woman loses her leg in an escalator mishap at Coors Field. Jake brought up a great point regarding escalator safety. Whenever you step onto a moving walkway, you need to be prepared like a boy scout in case some shit goes down. Some may just jump over the handrails to avoid amputation. Me? I plan on using a fat lady as a human surfboard.

Labels: injury, jake, tomfoolery