There are many ways to kill oneself in a quick, painless manner and this is not one of them. On my list of ways to kill myself, jumping into a pit of crocodiles ranks somewhere between smashing my face in with a brick and sticking my penis into a jet engine. Chug a bottle of sleeping pills. Drink yourself into a coma. Put your head in front of a shotgun, pull the trigger and splatter your head all over the wall behind you. Jump off of a goddamn building. Hang yourself. Do anything other than throwing yourself into a pit of hungry crocodiles.

Labels: death, stupidity, suicide